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The Dads’ Race (a poem)

The whistle blew,

and suddenly

a line of middle-aged men

remembered they had something to prove.

The children shouted.

The dads sprinted.

The knees complained.

Tomorrow’s ibuprofen

was already inevitable.

By the next morning,

we were archaeologists,

carefully excavating ourselves

from sofas across the town.

Maybe that’s what made me smile.

We can become wonderfully serious

about races

that last only seconds.

About being first.

About one last burst of speed.

While the children

were simply glad

that Dad joined in.

Then I wondered

how much energy

I spend chasing finish lines

that disappear

almost as quickly

as they’re crossed.

Jesus calls us

to a different race.

Not to outrun one another,

but to follow him,

helping others

keep going too.

Maybe next year

I’ll laugh a little more,

creak a little less,

and remember

that the race worth giving everything to

doesn’t end

at a line marked out with rope,

but in hearing Jesus say,

“Well done,

good and faithful servant.”

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How can I grow as a Christian?

Matt wrote this blog post last year…thankfully he is now through his Catatonia phase…but the reflection still stands. We need to keep digging deep into the treasure trove of God’s word and sharing that with whomever your primary audience may be today, this week or this month.

I’ve recently rediscovered one of my favourite 90s bands.* Listening to them takes me back to being a teenager and listening to their albums on CD over and over again. One of them was even on cassette, which I played loads…on a Walkman! Feeling old right now…

The Good Stuff

When I find a band or artist I really like I tend to dive down deep into their back catalogue so I can discover all of their music. I don’t think I’m wired to just like one song and then move on to something completely different. My theory is that if I like something by someone then chances are I might like more of their work, because I’ve found something good. So I stick with them. And it’ll take more than a weaker album or two to put me off them because they’ve got my loyalty; to me, they are still good.

Back to the title of this blog post: “How can I grow as a Christian?” Simply put, what I mean by this is how we can become more like Jesus. I reckon some of my listening habits might help us think about how this can work.

The Word

Sticking with the music theme, you could say that God has a ‘back catalogue’ in the Bible – what we call the Old Testament – and that his newer material is the New Testament. There’s plenty to go at right there that will help us to grow as Christians. There is no substitute for reading God’s word, not just to gain information but in order to meet with God. We can recommend great apps, reading plans and podcasts if anyone would like a bit of help with this – please get in touch if you’re interested

When I’ve been listening to the ‘90s music recently I’ve discovered incredible depth in the lyrics that I hadn’t noticed years ago, and I’ve come to appreciate some of the music that I didn’t rate back then. Maybe this is because I’m older, so I’m hearing it all from a different perspective now. There is a principle about Bible reading here – coming back to one passage again and again can help us rediscover things we’ve seen before, or even see things for the first time we’d never ever noticed until now. After all, God’s word is living and active, and the Holy Spirit longs to reveal more truth to us.

The New Material

But, growing as a Christian isn’t just about the Bible – as essential as that is. We also need to notice what God is doing in the world today, because in a sense we are still living in New Testament times. 

Jesus promised that he came to bring life, and life in all its fullness (John 10:10). There is a LOT more of him, his goodness and his kingdom to discover if we’re open to looking!

This means there is the stuff that Jesus is STILL doing in the world today, by his Spirit – in your street, your workplace, your life, your home, and we could see more of it if we ask! It’s sad when Christians sometimes seem to live off what he did in their life X many years ago, when he is STILL active today. Going back to music, some of my favourite artists make some of their best music (in my opinion) later on in their career, way after what some might call their ‘heyday’. Many may have forgotten them but they are still going, still creating, still telling their story, no matter the audience.

Some of us need to keep telling our story of who we know Jesus to be, regardless of how much the audience may change. It helps to notice and remember what he has done recently: down at Tesco’s, on the school run, in our friendship group, or wherever we are. 

Let’s remember the treasure trove that we have in the Old Testament and the rest of the Bible. Let’s embrace the joy of knowing Jesus’s presence by the Holy Spirit here with us now where ever we are in the UK or indeed the world. We pray that each of us and our churches can enjoy getting to know Jesus better than we ever have before.

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Long time no see…

I have a friend who cannot do something if you ask her to. It’s got a fancy name and everything…Pathological Demand Avoidance or PDA for short. It’s not her being difficult…it is a behaviour that stems from a physiological stress response. But, if you put it on a rota and stick it on the fridge she is happy to get on with the task! The brain is a wonderful and complex thing. 

I am happy to do something if you ask me…I will dive in and get into the nitty-gritty of it, I’ll look at it from all angles and work out the best way to do it and get on with it. I will do 95% of the work and bring it to the point of completion, but pushing that final button…I can’t. Take washing clothes for example…I can wash them, dry them, even iron and fold them but can I put them back on the shelf or hang them in the wardrobe? Nope! I’m responsible for producing a rota for the centre I work in…I am happy to find the dates, assign people to each date, even assign key passages or focus ideas. Can I send the rota out to people? Nah ah!! It sits in my draft messages for weeks until I have to redo it! 

I wish there was a nice neat name for my lack of ability to complete tasks other than ‘executive dysfunction around task completion’. I prefer to say I get stuck somewhere between finished and done. My tasks are finished…I’ve completed them, I just haven’t released them into the world (or the wardrobe). 

The astute among you may notice there hasn’t been a blog post for a wee while…Ok, 18 months nearly! I have to accept all responsibility for that, sorry. Please forgive the hiatus. We have been very active, Embers has been up to lots of stuff over the last 18 months, I have a whole file of blog posts that are finished but not done. So over the next few months there will be a mix of posts released…some will be reflections, some will be updates about work we have done, some will be simple resource recommendations.

Going back to the Pathological Demand Avoidance and me getting stuck between finished and done, I wonder if we can all be like that with our discipleship sometimes? Maybe you have been challenged to do something but because it was put to you as a demand you have instinctively gone “Nope, can’t do that” but actually if you put it into your daily routine it is more manageable. Or maybe you are happy to pray for someone, seek God for them and even find scripture relevant for them but you then struggle to actually tell them because it exposes you? Is there a way you can break the cycle this week? I’m writing a blog post and publishing it on the same day…what are you going to do?

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Undelivered post…

Before Christmas I heard a sermon where Gabriel was referred to as ‘God’s FEDEX guy of good news’. The phrase made me chuckle. Since then I have come back to that idea a number of times and it has sparked a few different thoughts in my mind around post! 

If God has a FEDEX guy it implies he has good news he wants to share with us…this is of course absolutely true!! God so loved you that he gave his only son, so that if you believe in him you can live with him forever. Now Gabriel wasn’t telling Mary that specifically – he was telling her she was going to have a baby…and that baby was the only son of God, who would one day make a way for all who believe to be in close relationship with God forever.

If that’s the good news that is being delivered then surely we want to make sure we are going to get it! 

Have you ever missed the postman and got one of those annoying little notes saying ‘we came but you weren’t in’? I was once sat in my house and heard the letterbox go, so I went to see what was there and one of those notes had been pushed through…that made me feel really cross. I was in but the postman had decided I wasn’t. If God has good news for you, are you in to receive it? Are you available for God to knock on the door and give you your message, or are you so busy going here and there that you don’t have time enough to slow down and give God the space to tell you whatever it is you need to hear?

Normally those annoying little notes give you a bit of an ultimatum…we tried to deliver to you today but you weren’t in. Your parcel has been returned to the depot and you will need to arrange to pick it up…God won’t give up trying to deliver your message to you. He doesn’t get fed up of no answer, he doesn’t have a store house of good news that he takes your portion to and then abandons it until you come looking for it. God is always up for one more try at getting through to you.

Another thought that came to me from that phrase ‘God’s FEDEX guy of good news’ was piles and piles of undeliverable post. Some people make a living out of opening and selling on undeliverable post, like redirections gone astray, wrong addresses or missed house numbers. Then there are people who have moved on and not told the sender, incorrect postage paid and not topped up and damaged parcels where the address is not readable. Is there undeliverable good news that is meant for you but you don’t know? Have you wandered so far off track that the good news meant for you cant get through? Maybe you have cut yourself off from the avenues through which such good news could be delivered? Do you have undelivered good news for someone else but your too scared to attempt delivery again? 

Over the Christmas period I reflected on this idea of God having a FEDEX guy of good news and wondered if we all have potential to be delivery people for God. Who do you bring good news to, and who brings good news to you? Maybe this year you want to intentionally put yourself in a group of three or four people who will all be good news delivery people for each other. 

If you want to get into this find a few others and start with the question ‘Where have you seen God this week?’. If you need help getting it going deeper we wold love to give you some other resources and pointers. Why not get in touch?

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Is the Bible really that important?

Many years ago in north Wales lived a young girl called Mary Jones.

She longed to learn how to read but there was no one to teach her, so she prayed about it.

In response, and to Mary’s surprise, the little chapel where she worshiped each Sunday with her parents was going to also become a school! Mary was delighted to learn alongside her friends, and she loved learning to read because she really longed to be able to read the Bible.

It was Mary’s love for Jesus that inspired this, and once she was able to read she longed for nothing more than to own her very own Bible, in the Welsh language. Bibles were very hard to come by in those days, especially in Welsh – and they were expensive. The odds were stacked against Mary as she came from a very poor family, but nothing would quench her determination!

In 1800 she turned 15. After scrimping and saving for 6 long years, she finally had the funds to buy the book she treasured. The nearest place where they were likely to be was about 25 miles away.

She set off early one day on the long journey, most likely barefoot, and she walked. And walked. And when she grew tired she walked some more. It was a risky journey – there was no guarantee that there would even be a Bible at the other end, not to mention the perils of a young girl taking such a journey on her own, and with all that money too.

Thankfully, Mary went back home with her very own Bible. To her it was the greatest treasure there could be, for it helped her know her saviour better, plus she read it with her own children years later. This true story of the girl who was so determined went on to greatly inspire those who who sourced it for her – so much so that it led to the foundation of The Bible Society. Here is what they say about their mission: “We believe the Bible is God’s gift to the world. We want everyone to discover its message for themselves”.

Wow! And so because of one young girl’s devotion to God, people all over the world are having the opportunity to meet Jesus.

Thank you Jesus for Mary Jones, and her legacy which carries on to this day. Please help everyone in the UK and the wider world to read or hear Scripture in their own language, that they may come to know the joy of knowing you (and your word) like Mary did. And to those of us who have our own Bibles, whether they are actual books or an app on our devices, may we value your word more than we currently do, but may be value the Author more!

Mary Jones and her Bible can be purchased here for just £2.99, and Mary Jones Pilgrim Centre (formerly Mary Jones World) can be visited in Bala, North Wales.

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For Christians the word ‘mission’ can be explained in different ways. Churches Together in England explores what mission is here.

I LOVE this quote from J. John: “Go on a missions trip – walk next door. It’s cheaper, and you don’t have to fundraise for a year!” (It can be found in this video if you’d like to hear it).

Naturally there is a place for God to send people ‘on mission’ to far-flung places, whether long-term or short. We have experienced the latter a number of times. Having said this, mission is also everyday, everywhere.

Most of us are not called to travel a long way to find our mission field, but we are all called to be on mission with the Holy Spirit in our daily lives, and so each one of us will have a person, group or place that is our mission field.

Matthew 9:35-10:1 says:

Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.” Jesus called his twelve disciples to him and gave them authority to drive out impure spirits and to heal every disease and sickness.

Even if you are saving for a mission trip, how about listening to J. John’s advice? We don’t need slick sales pitches for Jesus; we just need to live as though the hope we have in Jesus is real – because it is!

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Growing up…

Since becoming a parent I have found myself saying things I never expected to have to say…

’Please don’t pick your nose with my finger’ 

‘Don’t you dare lick Gary’ 

‘Felt tip pens are not for drawing on bottoms’. 

Sometimes I forget that my children are relatively new to being human…they don’t have 35 years experience so they need guidance sometimes on what is appropriate and what isn’t. It is my job as their parent to walk alongside them and teach them. Thankfully I am not doing this alone, I have a husband, family and friends who are all supporting and playing their part in helping raise Zoe and Keziah.

Now, it’s one thing to tell my three year old not to lick our friend who has come for tea but if I’m still having to tell her that when she is 13 or 30 then we have a bigger concern on our hands. This is what Paul was saying to the church in Corinth when he wrote his 1st letter to them. In chapter 3 he says: 

“Brothers and sisters, when I was with you I found it impossible to speak to you as those who are spiritually mature people, for you are still dominated by the mind-set of the flesh. And because you are immature infants in Christ, I had to nurse you and feed you with “milk,” not with the solid food of more advanced teachings, because you weren’t ready for it.”

Paul was despairing that the church in Corinth, despite having received some of the basic teachings of Christ, and having made commitments to live a certain way were not digging deep into their relationship with God and learning more from those around them, but beginning to form sides and state their preferences as to who they thought was the best teacher or the most important. They were behaving like spiritual 3 year olds when actually they should have matured past that stage. Paul is frustrated that he is having to go back to basics and re-teach them the foundations of the gospel again. 

Don’t read this wrong and come away thinking it isn’t okay to be a baby believer (metaphorically). If you are new to the faith or you are just beginning to explore what a relationship with Jesus is all about then explore away!! Paul loves to encourage new believers in their faith…what he is frustrated about is those who don’t bother to grow. 

If, having told Zoe that tongues are not for licking people, she continued to try and lick those she was comfortable with it would be very frustrating (and frankly really gross!). She wouldn’t be exercising her ability to control her impulses, she wouldn’t be exploring other ways of connecting with people and showing them they mean a lot to her. She wouldn’t be growing up! 

What Paul does, and what we hope to do with Zoe and Keziah is point it all back to God! Only God gives the growth. Paul isn’t saying you need to study me more and do as I say, although he was a good example for them to follow to begin with. He is saying get to know God more and you will receive direct from the grower himself. I’m not telling Zoe exactly how to behave – goodness knows my way of showing affection isn’t always the best, but what I am trying to do is lead her, by example to begin with, but ultimately to lead her to a point where she can know God and receive directly from the grower.

If you are new to the faith and want to explore more of what it all means we would love to hear from you and give you some pointers and resources.

If you have been a believer for a while and you don’t think you are growing, don’t panic. Maybe getting together with 2 or 3 fellow believers and exploring what it means to walk closer with God would be helpful. Get in touch and we can give you a few pointers to help you get started.

If you’re in the depths of parenting toddlers, or any age children for that matter, and you’re desperately trying to do your best to point them to God, know that you are not alone! That old saying ‘It takes a village to raise a child’ is so true. Why not get together with 2 or 3 other parents either at your stage or a few stages ahead to pray together about how to be the best conduit to God that you can be? 

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Devotion?

I just listened to a song called ‘Devotion’ by Gas Street Music, which can be found here.

I wonder to whom, or to what, you are most devoted? The song uses the word ‘all’, and it names the things that the singer wants to give to Jesus, out of devotion to him (“All my affection, all of my praise” etc).

The first Christians in the world ever were absolutely devoted, not just to Jesus and his message but also to one another. Check it out in the book of Acts, chapter 2 verse 42: 

They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 

They faced a lot of opposition, but because of their devotion and their unwavering commitment to the cause, the message of Jesus and the Church spread like wildfire. Of course the Holy Spirit had a big role to play too.

What gets in the way of your devotion to Jesus? Why not use this song or the Bible verse above to help you to realign your devotion to him? Better still, why not join together with a couple of friends who want to do the same thing, and start a discipleship group together! If this is you, we’d love to hear from you so please let us know if we can encourage or even mentor you in this.

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Living in scarcity?

I recently had the ‘joy’ of speaking to a number of mortgage lenders and advisers. All of them gave me the same prognosis: You don’t have enough for us to lend you more. Matt and I don’t have a huge monthly income but we also don’t have huge monthly outgoings. We have been told over and over again that we need to be earning twice as much as we currently do to be able to borrow the amount we would need to buy a 3 bed house. Lender after lender told us we didn’t have enough to repay the mortgage even thought our current rent is more than the mortgage payments would be.

There are all sorts of flaws in the affordability calculations that lenders run and we do not fit the mould when it comes to our finances. All of this has combined to make the last few weeks very frustrating. I have found myself feeling like there is little or no hope for us ever owning our own home meaning we will always be lining the pocket of a landlord. I have also found myself questioning if we do have enough money, which is silly. 

Two weeks ago I wasn’t questioning our finances; I was living them, knowing that we budget carefully, live within our means and trust God to cover any unexpected expenses. I thank God regularly that we have an amazing group of individuals, organisations and churches who cover us in prayer and financially underpin us also. But being told we don’t have enough was making me wonder if we did in fact have enough? Maybe we need more? Maybe we should both get ‘proper’ jobs so our household income is boosted? Are we satisfied with what we have? Is what we have good enough? 

Thankfully there was one conversation with a wonderful lady at Kingdom Bank which snapped me out of it all. If you haven’t heard of them, Kingdom Bank is a Christian savings and investment bank with a passion to see churches, charities and Christian workers thrive. It was so refreshing to have a conversation with an advisor who understood our financial situation, who sadly was saying that they still couldn’t lend us the amount we needed but who could suggest ways of reaching a point of being able to do that. The end result of the conversation was that we need an extra £64,000 to be able to buy a house that we liked the look of. I laughed a bit and said “Really only £64,000?” She heard the humour in my voice mixed with a bit of sadness. I was thinking ‘How are we ever going to raise that much??’. I suddenly remembered a fridge magnet that we have, it is a picture of a cow and simply says ‘The cattle on 1,000 hills are his’. As though she knew what I was thinking, or maybe God put the same thought in her mind, Jackie said ‘I know £64,000 might feel like a lot but the cattle on a thousand hills are the Lord’s so £64,000 is nothing. Pray about it and tell your supporters the need. You never know what will happen until you make people aware of the need. You would may be amazed by how generous people can be!’

That conversation with Jackie stopped me in my tracks…why was I questioning if I had enough? The God I am in relationship with owns the cattle on a thousand hills (that’s approx 1.5 billion according to the World Animal Foundation). He is providing for my every need and more. Jackie reminded me that we need to play our part, that we need to express our need and trust God to provide. Now, he might not do that how we expect, but he will provide. I am challenged to continue to live into God’s generosity. Instead of seeing how I can scrimp and save, I am pondering how I can be generous with what God has given me whilst being a good steward of it all. 

The house we liked has gone. Someone made an offer and we weren’t in a position to match it. We refuse to allow that to shape how we live though. We do not live in scarcity but in abundance! How are we going to share our abundant blessings with those around us!?

This post was originally written in August 2023. We are still renting and are continuing to pray hard about our housing situation. Although nothing is changing right now our landlord could choose to raise the rent at any time, like he did shortly after writing this reflection. It is not a comfortable position to be in but we know God calls us out of our comfort zones so here we are. If you want to know more about our housing situation, our hopes for the future and what needs to happen for us to get there do get in touch, we would love to share more details with you.

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What actually IS Embers?

Sometimes people ask us what we do, or what ‘Embers’ is, and there are lots of possible answers.

We tailor what we say depending on who is asking, to help them understand it well.

If you would like to know more about the training we provide, or how it could impact your life, your  church and even the world around you, take a look at the photo.

If you have any questions or would like to talk about it we’d love to hear from you. Click here to find out how to get in touch.

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